Everyone agrees that a good marriage requires a lot of work, right? Not Chuck and Laraine Chamberlain. The couple, married thirty years and “still on a honeymoon...
SUWANEE, GA — November 19, 2007 — Everyone agrees that a good marriage requires a lot of work, right? Not Chuck and Laraine Chamberlain. The couple, married thirty years and “still on a honeymoon,” recently moved to Suwanee, Georgia. They left a comfortable six-figure salary in New Jersey to start a new business helping couples improve their marriages. In the process, they’ve developed some unique approaches that some might consider to be unorthodox.
With a psychology degree, co-founder Chuck Chamberlain says, “Most enrichment programs focus on communication skills. While these skills are important, For Every Marriage focuses on the underlying feelings that motivate us to use those skills. We often have no problem with our communication skills in the workplace, but at home it’s a different story. It’s rarely about a lack of skills.”
In a For Every Marriage workshop, focusing on a relationship from the “inside out,” often starts with re-discovering those feelings that brought a couple together in the first place.
“How much ‘work’ was it,” asks co-founder, Laraine Chamberlain, “when you were courting? Did you have to make a ‘to do’ list to remind yourself to hold hands or spend time together? Most likely your feelings carried you along, doing things to show that person how much you cared. What kind of message do we give a spouse when we now approach loving them as a chore? When you restore the passion, it just doesn’t feel like work anymore.”
Listening in on a For Every Marriage workshop, retreat or private couple’s session, you might notice the absence of much talking. Instead, you might find couples busy drawing or working on a collage about their relationship while listening to music.
“Lectures, counseling or ‘talking it through’ are not part of our approach. This is especially helpful for couples who have fallen into destructive verbal habits,” says Chuck Chamberlain. “Our couples learn how to get their own ‘emotional stuff’ together first, so that when they do communicate it is with love and respect. We’ve seen it change lives.”
It would seem the ideal arrangement for men who prefer avoiding verbal “show-downs” with their wives, and who would rather die than share personal information in front of a group. Also ideal for men is the fact that a For Every Marriage resort retreat, such as the Cozumel retreat in January, has only 2 three-hour workshop sessions. The rest of the retreat is devoted to free time – a chance to re-charge those lost courtship feelings.
“It’s weird how this stuff works.”
Married 37 years, May Smith of Suwanee said, “Cozumel was a wonderful time, made more special by the workshops provided by For Every Marriage. . . It was just enough ‘workshop’ and plenty of fun. . . It’s weird how this stuff works. It literally works on FEELINGS. This is so much more powerful than working on and understanding behavior.”
Events and Workshops
The Chamberlains offer local, regional and exotic retreats and workshops. They also offer a couples’ evening they call “Your Love Story.” In addition, they have started to use their techniques with organizations that are experiencing problems with stress, morale and relationships. They’ve found that many of their techniques apply to any relationship.
For more information:
Chuck Chamberlain, 678-482-0535, chambch@charter.net, www.ForEveryMarriage.com